Can We Choose?

Having a choice and become willing.

Choice –

  • Choose to Approach Problems in a Cool, Calm, Collected Manner
  • Choose to Rest, Relax, and Rejuvenate Your Body
  • Choose to Calm Your Mind, Be Centered, and Think Clearly Under Pressure
  • Choose to Be Physically Tough and Full of Energy
  • Choose to be Mentally Tough, Emotionally in Control, and Action Oriented
  • Choose to Communicate in a Positive, Productive, Low-Stress Manner
  • Choose to Be Spiritually Strong, Resilient, and Joyful Every Day

This is the Coles notes version of a 12 session anger management workshop I facilitate.

Our recovery really is a choice.  How powerlessness comes into it is that once we start drinking we cannot stop.

This is a serious problem.  Like Sandy Beach says if your life is not going as planned, check your drinking.  Just a suggestion like the rest of the program.

Recovery is possible for alcoholics and addicts who honestly want to stop their addictions.  The un-manageability can be stopped.  We need to have a conscious need and a desire for help.  We need willingness.  Ask yourself – to what length are you willing to go to achieve sobriety?  To be willing is to be ready and prepared.  I made a podcast about giving up our addictions and going through the loss.  We need to be strong willed, not hard-headed.  A rocket ship can take off from the ground, and uses most of its energy to get off the ground.  Once it is off it uses less fuel to maintain momentum.

I have heard about creating an identity.  We can create a recovery identity.  In my addiction I did not really know who I was.  I could be happy one minute and into a big fight the next.  I was really confused.  According to James Marcia we can achieve an identity when we face a crisis and make a commitment.  He defined a crisis as a time of upheaval where old values or choices are being re-examined and new alternatives are explored.  Once we make the choice we need to be willing to make the commitment.

Sometimes we can make a commitment without exploring alternatives.  We just blindly accept what people are telling us without question.  If someone tells us not to do something and we do the opposite can also be this form of commitment without exploring alternatives.  Because the individual is not facing a crisis.  They are either accepting what people are telling us or are blindly walking away from choices that we have not yet made.

The opposite is also true though.  We can constantly face crisis and never commit to anything.  I have seen this in some individuals who never really commit to recovery and they are in and out of recovery (maybe they started the revolving door concept?).  This causes way more anxiety.  The world is not predictable and this individual struggles to make their unpredictable world predictable.

If you want to achieve an identity face a crisis (something you need to make a decision on, stay in your addictions or get into recovery) and make a commitment.  Then you will start to form an identity.  Ask yourself, do you want the next five years to look like the last?  If not need to change.

For example, I could have continued on my addictive lifestyle path, but I chose to go into recovery.  Actually the choice was made for me, but now that I have lived in both worlds I maintain my commitment to recovery over everything else.  Another example is that I am First Nations.  I can go on and deny that I am First Nations and never face this crisis, but I choose to identify being Carrier/Sekani.  So my commitment is to help First Nations individuals who have addiction issues and hence the reason for putting these videos together in the first place.

Issue is people are not willing to make a choice.  They are not willing to face their crisis and make a commitment to recovery.  Unless this is done they will continue living in two different worlds.  A world where addiction is not an issue and a world where their addiction is their whole world.  I know, addiction was my world for a long time.

So I encourage you to become willing to make a choice to get into active recovery by thoroughly and honestly completing the steps, especially step 4 and 5, and if you do you will realize how valuable this choice is and probably wish you made this choice sooner.  All My Relations.

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